Do you allow yourself to heal?

How to learn to be patient with your own healing process and follow its natural flow.

Today there is a plethora of different therapies, retreats and treatment models with the message of change and healing of childhood trauma. There are also many self-help books with the given theme of helping us to help ourselves.

Although the idea behind all this is mostly good (there are of course more obviously profit-driven alternatives), and I myself am part of this industry, I would still like to say that there can be certain consequences with all the help that is offered.

The idea that we are something that needs to be fixed, repaired and healed within us can fuel the idea that there is something wrong with us. It can make us believe that there is a service coming from outside ourselves that can make us better, more whole.

On the one hand, it is obvious that one needs to be disturbed in one's habitual thought patterns in order to be inspired to change, and that disturbance needs to come from outside of us through something that happens or something that is said. On the other hand, it can make us believe that the solution to our problems lies outside ourselves, in this service offered or in another person.

This is where we hit dead ends in our desire to change. This is where we risk only looping in the same circles with the belief that we are changing. We think we are busy healing, but what we are most busy with is taking in new ideas and concepts, but without first stopping and slowly but surely clearing out the old ones.

And it takes time. Healing and change take time. It cannot be accelerated. Anyone who has tried to force a physical or mental healing process will soon notice that it will backfire and that everything will take longer or, in the worst case, stop completely.

I would like to say that the entire culture that exists today around healing is positive and developing for us, but the way I see it, it is important to remind ourselves of the following: no matter how fantastic methods of healing and change you have access to, we cannot escape the fact that the body, just like nature, follows its own rhythm when it comes to change.

It is not you, i.e. your ego, that decides when to let go of something. It is what needs to let go, that decides when it is ready to let go.

In other words, it is your tears that decide when they have finished crying, not you. It is your fear that decides when it is no longer afraid, not you. And it is your body that decides when it is ready for a new reality, a reality of peace and love, not you.

To get support in your process of change, which is challenging, sometimes boring and often frustrating, you can book a conversation with me here.

From me you can get inspiration to start the process of change. But once it is started, you need to accept that it takes time.